Game Recap: Habs vs Ducks 30/11/11

Things I Felt While Watching This Game: A Bullet List

• Look at all the Habs fans in the stands
• I love road games because they're almost like home games
• and then Kostitisyn!!
• an early lead!
• how can we fuck this up!
• we're playing the motherfucking ducks, the team that is 29th in the league!
• they've won six games all year!
• hillier probably still has vertigo!
• it's smooth sailing from here!
• oh wait no fuck you
• montreal is still here to crush my hopes and dreams
• But okay, tie game. That's okay, we can still win it.
• Oh it's not a tie game anymore.
• Still okay, we can score one more and even it up. We have yet to reach our ceiling of 3 goals per game, still in this, we can do it, I believe (because I am a masochist)
• Holy fuck what is wrong with our power play
• why are we all dead i don't understand what is going on
• REF STOP GIVING US A FUCKING POWER PLAY WE DON'T WANT IT TAKE IT BACK
• oh my god why have they scored again
• fuck
• we're so fucked
• 15 minutes into the third and we finally finally get our first shot on goal
• well thank god for that, for a minute there i thought we were going to fuck up the third entirely
• theme music for our third period: a classic
• why is somebody standing in front of the net
• WHY IS NOBODY PAYING ATTENTION TO THE DUCK STANDING RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE NET
• HOLY FUCK SOMEBODY PAY ATTENTION TO HIM NOBODY IS EVEN MAKING HIS LIFE DIFFICULT
• i hate you all
• jaques why would you pull budaj
• why would you do that
• why do you hate me
• adding a six man to float around the ice and do fuck all is not how you score goals
• you score goals by shooting the puck at the net but we have literally forgotten how to do this
• i coach 14 year olds who know how to do this
• the intevitable empty net goal because: lol why not
• suicide hotline: it's me, katie
• talk me down from the ledge

In conclusion: The Montreal Canadiens are a Bad Hockey Team Who Were Bad At Literally All Aspects of Hockey This Evening and now I am going to find out if it's possible to drown myself in the shower.